Saying Goodbye to a Friend

Last May I posted a story here about my new kitten Phantom. If you don't remember you can go back and read it here.

Today I had to tell him goodbye.

He had been sick. He was only a year old, but had been sick with a variety of problems, but all relating to his blood, and bleeding. Teething was even difficult for him, and we had to watch him carefully during that time to make sure he didn't lose a lot of blood. He got through that, but the major trauma for him came in the form of bruises. Just a tiny bump or jar could create a hematoma. With his blood issue these could be devestating. The first instance he had with one was several months back, and we almost lost him then. However, after a blood transfusion and a few days in the hospital we were able to nurse him back to health. Unfortunately the incident changed him. He would become lethargic from time to time, limp a bit and just be unhappy for days at a time. He didn't want to play much, and when he did it was for only short periods and he would have to rest. It was as if we had an older cat. I guess almost dying takes a lot out of you, even if you're a cat.

Sunday Phantom moped around a lot, and mostly stayed in his basket. That evening when it was time for bed I found him laying on the couch in his regular spot. When I started to rub him a bit and tell him good night he reacted with a low growl. I knew something was up, so I checked him over good and discovered another hematoma (it was near his back leg). I rubbed his neck and ears good, told him to rest.

Monday morning, he was still mopey, but we knew that there's not much can be done for a hematoma, so we decided to give him a day to recover a bit before we called the vet. That evening, I picked him up and discovered that the hematoma was larger than I had expected. Tina and I decided we'd take him to the vet in the morning.

Tuesday morning, we took him to the vet. He was very tired, draggy, but alert. X-Rays and a variety of tests showed that it was a hematoma (as we had guessed). His blood work looked was fine, and we brought him home. As the evening progressed he got worse.

This morning we took him back to the vet. He had camped out in the bathroom last night, and this morning he was still in the same spot - not good. That was 5:30Am. The veterinarian office doesn't open until 8:30. A long three hours pass and we take him back in. We get a call that he needs another transfusion, and probably another several day stay at the hospital.

I had gone through this before and it was not something I was prepared to do again. I had to make a decision. It wasn't easy. Today I made the decision to let my friend go. He was hurting. He was sick. His chances of surviving something like this again was slim. We didn't even know if the transfusion would would work. What I did know is I didn't want him to suffer. I couldn't allow him to hurt.

I felt it only fair that Samuel get a chance to tell Phantom goodbye. Tina stayed with Phantom while I went to get Samuel from school. He's a good kid, smart, and known to always do the right thing. He's only 8, but I trust his judgement on things like this. We talked on the way back to the veterinarian clinic and he understood. He understood my decision.

I knew I was staying with Phantom for the whole thing; it was my decision to let him go, so it was my duty - no - my priveledge and honor to stay with my friend as he passed. He was my buddy. I didn't expect Tina or Samuel to stay, but Samuel insisted that he would stay (remember: he's been known to do the right thing). So, we all three were there to tell him goodbye.

He was a champ and a real pal. He was everything I ever expected and more. I've always had a horrible allergy to cats, but Phantom cured that for me. I can romp and play with cats and kittens now with no bad allergy issues. I really never imagined that I'd ever be over my cat allergy.

Phantom was my cat.

We buried him in the yard along with a paperwad, his stuffed toys, and some of his favorite treats. He lies just outside the kitchen and diningroom windows near "Samuel's Tree". Samuel decided on that. It's a nice spot - always cool there in the hottest part of the summer, and always shady.

On his box I wrote the words to a little song I made up for him when he first came home with us.

You've got a cute little nose

and everybody knows

about your fuzzy little chin

I'm gonna sing it all again

about your funny little fuzzy ears,

No telling what he really hears

About his cute little nose

That everybody knows.

You can hear the song here: Cute Little Nose (Phantom's Song)

Samuel and Tina also wrote a special notes on the box about how they'll always miss him and remember him.

Today I said goodbye to a most special friend.

-=Jim